The lemon pound cake is quite tasty...
In case you didn't catch my wording earlier, Yes, I have a New Place!
Big changes are happening right now in my life and I am kind of stressed out, but things are definitely falling into place nicely so far.
So far:
1. I got my own apartment (which Mark will move into once we get married)!
2. I am getting married in 10 days!
3. I am changing jobs!!
I would like to focus on the fact that I will be a married woman really soon!
Currently, I am so nervous.
You guys are probably thinking: "Oh well of course you are. Getting cold feet is normal; this is such a big decision."
But actually that is NOT why I am nervous to get married.
Then what is making you nervous, Shannah?
Well Intrigued Reader, let me show you my irrational imagination that I have been cursed with.
All of my life I have been terrified of crowds. Sure, I have improved immensely when it comes to me putting myself out there, that much is 100% true. But I have a serious case of Stage Fright that I don't think I will ever get over.
My voice shakes, my hands shake, I say "uhm" like a thousand times, and I get really really hot and turn bright red. It's awful.
In school, when the teacher would go over the reports that she/he assigned to the class, the phrase "You will present your report to the class" was the equivalent of "You have cancer" to me.
Oh my gosh, and heaven help me if I ever get asked to give a talk in church!! I might just have to roll over and die if that happened.
So you can imagine my fear when it comes to my walking down the isle having everyone's eyes on me. It sound so scary! But thankfully, the eyes will then be on Mark AND me during the ceremony rather than me alone. Phew!
That is why I am nervous. Well, that, and the fact I hope everything goes smoothly and the plans go as accordingly.
Nope, not the huge commitment to being with one person for the rest of my life, having "mine" and "his" items and money become "ours," and taking life on together are not scaring me at all.
Just the fact I'll have to stand in front of a bunch of people. Yep. That makes sense doesn't it?
I am not nervous about the quality of my marriage because I know that Mark and I are perfect for each other. I am not living in a fantasy land thinking that we will never bicker and everything will be lollipops and rainbows. I accept we will have trials, but he and I know how to communicate and work through differences together successfully. Even if I am stubborn and want an apology even when I definitely had my fair share of the misunderstanding, I eventually realize it and grovel;]
We are seriously made for each other.
The other day we were playing Guitar Hero and I totally beat him down. I just looked at him, silent, and held out my fist with a smirk on my face. *I needed a fist bump for that victory* He just started laughing and gave in. We have great times together and love a lot of the same things.
He always knows how to make me feel better and knows just what I need, and vice versa for him.
People have asked me how do I know that he is "The One," and I like to respond with:
I know what it is like to love, but realize it isn't right.
With Mark, I love and know it is right without a shadow of a doubt.
As Mark's mom, Ruth, always says to me: There are no such things as coincidences.
Sappy post, I know. But who doesn't enjoy a little love story every once in awhile??
